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Integrity is a skill
As with all skills, they're developed and learned over time. For example, few people have an inherent skill in math and most people must learn the rules and exceptions associated with math to finally get a grasp on the concept.  As a result, math is learned after repeating special techniques over and over, including doing some memorization. This is also true with Integrity.

Training
A qualified carpenter must endure years of training, practice and exposure to building materials and different construction situations that call for his talent. Integrity must also endure years of practice and exposure, for integrity is NOT necessarily inherent within a person's temperament and personality. Instead, integrity is a trait that is taught and learned over an individual's lifetime.

Who, what , where, when, why & how?
Each of us, individually, have to learn what integrity is, how is works, who can have it, when to use it, where it applies and why it's so important in your personal definition of success. ONLY you can apply integrity into your life. You can't force it on someone else and no one can force it on you and expect it to stick. The people who can have it are those who want it and see it's value. No one else.

Point of reference
Integrity is a guideline, a benchmark, a point of reference or a goal that is used to make decisions that rely on truth and honesty. All things are related to this point of reference and judged accordingly. To maintain integrity, you must remember to refer to truth and honesty in ALL decisions, thoughts, actions and reactions. That's not an option if you're to have and maintain integrity in your life.

A great tower
Integrity is something that a person builds and maintains during a lifetime. You can consider integrity as a building within a person's heart that starts when the person is young. This "building" begins with the first hole that is dug. Once the hole is dug, the foundation is laid--usually by parents and other leaders (church and school instructors). The walls follow with windows and doors added along the way. The windows would allow for transparency and serve as a type of checks-and-balances. The doors would allow for simple modification of a person's definition of integrity to enter into the training; trusting it's for the better. The roof is added later and serves to protect what has already been established from negative outside forces.

Re-building
Just as you can re-build a house when it falls down, so too can you re-establish integrity if you fall away from it's blessings. Note that in reality if a house must be rebuilt, it does not happen in a matter of hours or days.

Tomorrow is a new day
Leaving the past where it is, picking up the pieces and moving on is critical if you choose to "turn over a new leaf." Keys that lead to success in this endeavor include 1) attitude, 2) understanding, 3) grasping the reigns of life firmly and 4) implementing a new and improved plan to work with which allows tomorrow to be a clean slate for you. Let the past go and concentrate on the present and the future.

Looking back is important for learning from our mistakes--but leave it at that--"looking back." Don't bring the past into the present or the future for any other reason, especially if the past is tainted in any way. Make new memories; Memories that are ethical and moral--blameless memories that shout and echo integrity.

"Act as if"
Think about the future in the present tense. That is to say, live life as though what you're striving for has already happened and you're already benefiting from it's blessing. If you keep thinking of what you desire, integrity, as something you'll experience in the future, it will remain there...in the future. Bring it into "today." Live that life now.

A plant
Integrity can also be considered as a plant. It is planted as a seed in youth by loved ones, watered in childhood by the individual and eventually blossoms in adulthood producing fruit. The more you water it throughout life, the more it grows and blooms. Just as it is with plants, if neglected at any point, it WILL wither and die. If your plant has died, simply plant a new seed. Water it daily and make sure it gets plenty of sun! Note that a plant does not blossom immediately but must go through a life cycle first. So, getting familiar with integrity will take a while.

Maintenance
Integrity must be maintained. A janitor cleans rooms for a living and you must be like a janitor to maintain true integrity. If you avoid the dust that settles and don't remove the trash that accumulates, your (definition of) integrity begins to diminish and decreases in value. A strict maintenance schedule must be kept or the integrity that has taken a lifetime to build will come crumbling down in a matter of minutes.

Delusions are simple
Have no illusions; integrity is not especially easy. Just as you can find and implement integrity into your own life, so too can integrity be lost. Some of the most destructive things and behavior in life are easy and simple to accomplish.

One thing you can almost always count on in life; if it's worth anything of real value, it will probably not be easy.

Loss of integrity
It's critical to note that integrity can be lost or compromised beyond recognition in a person's life. I've been there and am in the process of re-establishing integrity in my own life...and I'm finding it's not easy the second time around. Recognizing that integrity has been compromised or is totally lost from your life is the first step of many to come. The second step is to do something about it--and that is to make the decision to plant a new seed and water it daily...even minute-to-minute.

Holding up to the test
Consider the cup that cannot hold water. A person that lives their life without integrity is like a cup that cannot hold water. The crack may be invisible to the eye, but if it doesn't hold up to the test, that cup is virtually worthless. Many people walk around with a small crack that is easily hidden, but time reveals the flaw to everyone.

Honesty
...is a separate issue that definitely applies to personal integrity. To be honest is to apply integrity to a situation, circumstance or instance. Honesty and integrity go hand-in-hand without exception or separation. There are few things that complicate an issue or hurt more than dishonesty. At least honesty leaves a person with some sense of closure and dignity--despite the fact that honesty may sometimes hurt because you'll know the truth.

The role of integrity in "love"
Integrity helps to define love although many things collectively define love, Integrity is a little different in that it plays a unique role in love. Integrity acts as a binder of the many things that help to describe the meaning of love. Integrity helps to keep together all the things that make up love so that love is constant and pure. For example, without a binder such as water, bread would be nothing more than baked powder with seasoning. Paper would be a collection of loose fibers.

Integrity can help to define you by acting as a binder that keeps your words, your thoughts and your actions honest, worthy and admirable to those around you.

Integrity will:

• begin and continue as a personal ON-GOING decision to stand firm on principals that are inherently good

• most likely take the long, straight and narrow road and does not cave into lying, cheating or stealing

• tell the truth over a lie despite the consequences

• suffer the consequences instead of compromising itself

• help to steer a person clear of those that easily bow to a corrupt nature

• be apt to lend a helping hand simply as a by-product of this special lifestyle decision

• diminish and eventually disappear if you choose to ignore and abandon it's blessing

• set you apart from a great number of people who have chosen to follow the lead of the current drummer

• sometimes separate you from the "in crowd," but that's not always the case

• on some occasions, make other people feel uncomfortable around you because of their own insecurities, problems and guilt

• impress others only because of your decision to adhere to such a (sometimes) difficult lifestyle

• sometimes put you into tight situations that APPEAR to be needlessly difficult

• allow for rebuilding. It will come back and continue to blossom if you choose and allow it to grow within.

Integrity will NOT:

• allow for decisions that may compromise personal belief and faith

• always APPEAR to help a situation

• be an easy decision for all situations

• be Disneyland and roses all the time

• give in to peer pressure simply because "everyone's doing it"

• give up on you--you can always re-establish integrity by making a conscious effort to re-build what past mistakes have broken down

• in an obvious way come to the rescue of a person

Benefits
Integrity always, without exception benefits a person, but the benefit is NOT always immediately recognizable. In fact, some times the benefits of Integrity are not obvious for many years down the road. It's possible for a person to live most of their lives and not see the benefits of integrity until late in life. It's different for everyone and doesn't mean it's better or worse for you. It just means it's different for you, that's all.

Notice
As a side note, please know that in many cases, "things are not as they appear."

Experiences
Integrity is NOT a one time experience or situation. Instead, Integrity is an on-going experience of a collection of situations where sound decisions are made based on good judgment, discernment, wisdom and knowledge.

By-Products
Integrity has its by-products. As you become more familiar with a lifestyle that allows for integrity to bloom wild and free, life is usually filled with more and more peace--a by-product. After a while of on-going decisions guided by integrity, people begin to take notice. Employers begin to place more trust in you and your abilities. Friends rely more and more on your apparent wisdom. Better decisions lead to a better life. 

Misdirected hate
As a direct result of your decision to establish integrity within yourself, you'll gain favor with many people. Unfortunately some will hate you for it--which is another by-product. People hate other people for the strangest reasons. Someone dedicated to truth and honesty is a typical target for those who pursue chaos and the misfortune of hate. There are many reasons for this misdirected hate, but the most common reason is their own insecurity (referring to the person who hates). People WILL be threatened by you because of your decision to maintain integrity.

Other definitions
People can tweak or modify their definition of integrity to suit their current needs, desires and ambitions. For that reason, it's possible to have a large number of definitions of the word or state of affairs in a person's life--but that doesn't necessarily mean they're all sound definitions.

Personal definition
This personal definition of integrity is an attempt to offer an unbiased presentation of what integrity can and cannot mean. That is to say this definition of integrity:

• is in no way the one-and-only true definition

• may actually serve to corrupt someone's definition of integrity--BUT this definition has a sincere intention to help explain the many sides of integrity's purity and benefits so that the reader can decide for themselves

• should help to answer some of the many questions people may have about integrity and the possible role it may play in a person's life, decision making, thoughts, actions and destiny

• should broaden one's insight about how much of a role integrity plays in their daily life, even minute-to-minute

The great cathedral
Remember, you can live life the way you want, for good or for evil.  But I'd like to suggest the following story for your consideration:

It's how you do it...
Needless to say, the previous story about the building of the cathedral reveals that it's not what you have to do, it's not what you want to do or what you think you should do, but it's about how you do all things in life.

How you do what you have to do; how you do what you want to do and how you do what you think you should do, will determine your success.  You'll "have to do things," you'll "want to do things," and you'll "think you should do things" your whole life, but it's the quality of how you do them that really matters.

Integrity plays a critical part in quality decisions, thoughts and actions.  It'll be obvious in how you act and react to expected and unexpected circumstances.

The "Gifted" Musician
Everybody enjoys one or several types of music, regardless of their sex, culture, age or beliefs. Music is truly one of the few universal avenues to express yourself to where others will consider your art despite who you might be in their eyes.

Most people only enjoy listening to music, but few enjoy listening and creating music. Some musicians are good, some are better and then there are those who are exceptionally good--considered to have the "gift" of music. But even they have to practice.

I attended a concert recently where a fan of the featured musician anxiously walked up to his favorite performer and said;

Just as the great musician must practice everyday to maintain his high level of artistic talent, so too must we practice implementing integrity into our every-day lives.

Remembering
Allowing integrity to seep out only every now-and-then is not acceptable if we are to benefit fully from the blessing that integrity has to offer over a lifetime.

Integrity should be allowed to flow freely in the mainstream of our thoughts and actions. That, realistically, does not happen over night. It's a decision we must make every morning after we wake up. It's a decision we need to "remember" to make every morning after we wake up.

Studies show that if you do something twenty-one times in a row (but not like a robot in immediate succession), that "function" should be ingrained enough to where it becomes second nature after a while.

A simple note on the bathroom mirror, or one just above the door knob of your bedroom or some other place where you're sure to see it every morning--for 21 days or more--should do the trick. Give it a shot.

A wonderful life
Choosing a wonderful life over (just) life can make the difference between success and failure, peace and chaos, love and hate, and integrity plays a key role in those decisions.

Choose to be like the young man laying the brick to build what he believes to be the greatest cathedral in the whole world.

Choose to plant a seed that will become the immovable oak.

Choose to be like the janitor that maintains a clean household.

Choose to be a cup that can hold water and is half full instead of half empty.

You can do it. It's as simple as a decision--one of many that will be based on wisdom, good judgment, discernment and knowledge.

Choose to incorporate integrity in your life today.

That, my friend, is integrity.

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Defining Integrity In A Nutshell
...or in this case, in a  fortune cookie.

The other day I was having lunch with two friends at a Chinese restaurant in Flagstaff, Arizona when I received an interesting "fortune" from the traditional after-dinner fortune cookie (that I usually smash on the table, work through the pieces for the "fortune," then consider the alleged "fortune" and toss what's left--I don't like the cookie, just the fortune):

On this particular day the unusually unique "fortune" read:

"Integrity is doing the right thing, even if nobody is watching."

After I stopped coughing and finally got some air as a result of the shock of reading something so prevalent in my constant search to define words that I want to apply to my life, I realized that this "fortune" was by far the most profound, applicable and true "fortune" cookie I had ever received.

Such a simple yet concise definition of the word integrity from a fortune cookie? I could hardly believe it!

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My personal story
I began to focus on integrity (or the lack of integrity in my life) back in college (1999) and didn't know it.

One Saturday night a friend and I went to a supermarket in Flagstaff, AZ to buy a bottle of liquor--as many college students do. As we stood in front of the liquor considering such an important purchase, my "friend" shoved a bottle of 101 proof peppermint schnapps in his pants, zipped up his coat and said "walk in front of me." Then he pulled me in front of him and we headed for the front door past the cashiers. Being the sheep that I was when he was around, I did exactly as he said and we got out of the store alive with a stolen bottle of liquor.

I don't remember much of that night except for one thing; how terrible I felt for participating in that simple act of theft. I'd stolen things in the past here-and-there, but for some reason this experience was different. A few days went by and I still couldn't shake the feeling of shame that overwhelmed my thoughts.

Finally I decided to make things right and met with the manager of the supermarket where the crime took place. I expected the manager to call the police and follow through with an arrest. Instead he said the following which changed my life:

"It seems as though there are few people left in this world, especially college students, who allow integrity to rule their life."

Then he turned to me and looked me right in the eyes and said,

"Son, without sounding condescending and with all-due-respect, I'm proud of you."

He took my money for payment of the bottle we stole and opened the door for me as I left. I understood everything he said except one thing. I wasn't quite sure what integrity was. I had an idea, but I wanted to know EXACTLY what integrity was because I could tell he knew the value of integrity in life...and I wanted that.

That was the beginning of my research of the word integrity. Then during my research I noticed there was little in print or on the Internet that expanded on such a valuable word. As a journalism major, I took it upon myself to offer what I learned in my research to everyone else via the power of the Internet.

Having said that, I hope integrity takes a hold of your life and doesn't let go, just as a pit-bull locks its jaw and can't let go. Unshakable. Unlimited. The giant oak whose roots go deep.

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